Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is one holiday I look forward to every year. An attitude of gratitude makes a tremendous difference in a person's life. We all know how to complain to God, but the best side of our nature is the one that says, “ God, thank you for your blessings. Thank you for this good land. Thank you for food on our table. Thank you for this dear friend. Thanks you for the Christian faith.” Yes, an attitude of gratitude makes a difference.

An ancient proverb says, “A gift unacknowledged is a gift unreceived.” And that is true. If you send a graduation gift to a high school senior, if you send someone a birthday card or a thoughtful note, sometimes you never know for certain whether the person got it or even cared about it if he or she never mentions it.

In a similar way, we receive many blessings from God, and we need to thank him, to acknowledge those gifts. There can be no doubt that being aware of those blessings and thanking God for them makes us better, happier people. A life that does not have the dimensions of gratitude is a life not being lived to the fullest. It is life in a narrow dimension.

We live with its problems, and if we aren't careful, we can get to the point where the problems are all we see. But the Christian faith and particularly thanksgiving to God, helps us to see life in a fuller dimension. Consider for example, Acts 16:16-26. Paul and Silas have been put in jail in their city of Philippi because their preaching of the gospel was interfering with the income of some unscrupulous men, who owned and abused a slave girl who told fortunes in the market place.

Paul and Silas had gone to the rescue of this girl, and her owners were furious because their source of income was gone. And so at the urging of these men, Paul and Silas were arrested. They were not just put in prison; they were put in the inner prison. As we would say today, they weren't just put in jail, they were put under the jail. On top of this, their feet were put in stockades.

But now notice what Paul and Silas did while they were in prison. What would your attitude be? Most of us would probably be resentful. Here we are just trying to serve God and help this poor girl, and the next thing they know they are beaten and put in a dark and dirty jail. That's the way we might feel about the situation, but how did Paul and Silas react? Well, the scripture says that at midnight they sang praises to God.

They broke out of life in the narrow dimension of their problems and saw it in a larger dimension. They saw that God was still there and there were still things to be thankful for. That is the marvelous secret of Christianity.

In our lives, the worst may have happened. Maybe you've lost a dear loved one, maybe you've lost your job, maybe there have been marital problems or problems with the children. God doesn’t expect us to be thankful for those things. But even in those things, we can be thankful on the strength of Christ. We can be thankful that as we work with God, good things can come out of God. We have only to look at Good Friday to see that is true. In that spirit I wish you a Happy Thanksgiving.

Coping With Grief

When someone important to you dies, facing the holidays can be a challenge! Those who are grieving the loss of a loved one often dread the approaching celebrations and this can be a stressful time. This is part of NORMAL GRIEF!

One suggestion for coping with grief is to give your faith the opportunity to help you through this difficult time of life. The religious rituals that occur during the time after death give comfort, closure and perspective to grieving loved ones. A funeral and/or memorial service celebrates the life of the deceased and lifts up our particular religious understanding of life and life after death. Words of comfort from Holy Scriptures remind the bereaved of the love and presence of God. The 23rd Psalm from the Judeo Christian tradition affirms that the Lord is with us and walks with us through the “dark valleys of the shadow of grief.” Clergy persons can offer great support and comfort. For many, faith offers the help to accept the unacceptable!

Another suggestion for coping with grief is to accept and express the powerful feelings that accompany grief. While each person’s grief is individual; sadness, guilt, and anger are very common feelings. Crying is a healthy and acceptable expression of sadness for men and women and releases built up tensions.

Finally support groups can help as you deal with these very powerful feelings associated with grief. The faith community in the Hammonton area has responded to this need and St. Anthonys offers a twice a month group entitled “Tears to Joy”.

The Hammonton Ministerium is sponsoring a new group entitled Coping with Grief. The Presbyterian Church at Hammonton, 326 Bellevue Ave. will host this 3 session support and information group beginning Monday, November 10th from 7:00 pm – 8:30 pm. (Session 2- Nov 17th, #3 Nov 24th) The group will be facilitated by Rev Michael Bolduc, Caring Hospice Chaplain, is limited to 12 members and is free of charge. Topics that will be covered include coping with grief, tips for getting through the holidays and spirituality and healing. For more information or to sign up please call the Presbyterian Church at 609- 561-0168.

As we approach the holiday season May God Bless and help you through this very difficult time of grief!

Rev Michael Bolduc

Caring Hospice Chaplain 

Hugs Are Good

Hugs are good. I'll take them any time. My teenage son is in the habit these days of giving me hugs after one of our deep conversations about the meaning of life, which we have quite often. He even gives them to me when things are simply going along as normal. I especially like them after my Sunday sermon. He often comes up to me when the service ends and hugs me. It's as if he is telling me, “Dad, you did a good job and I really got something out of what you said.” You can image how I feel after that!

Then there's my wife. I actually lose count how many times we hug a day. One of my favorite hugs is when she is washing the dishes and I come up and hug her from behind and silently let her know how precious she is. She must like it, because she now does the same thing to me when I'm washing the dishes. Hugs are almost like manners in our home. They're expected and appreciated. They oil the wheels of our daily lives and make the ride that much smoother. Without them, I think life would wear us out.

For my twins, a boy and a girl, hugging is second nature. I really enjoy seeing the look on a visitor's face when my son freely offers them a hug, showing in his way that they are welcome in our home. The reaction of the unsuspecting guest speaks for itself – most people are used to not being cherished. That makes me sad. But that sadness is easily washed away when my little girl, out of the blue, tells me that she needs a daddy hug today. As we embrace she whispers in my ear, “I love you.” Holding her close I whisper back, “I love you too, Boo,” calling her by her nickname.

Around the Thanksgiving dinner table this year, I have to look no farther than the table to know what I'm thankful for.